My Imaginary Friend Can Beat Up Your Imaginary Friend

It's a conceit that I've held for a long time towards organized religion.
The notion that various faiths, mostly of the Judeo-Christian tradition, have continued to wage war -- whether real or imagined -- against each other in a battle to prove that theirs is the one, true God.

"My Imaginary Friend Can Beat Up Your Imaginary Friend"

You can't imagine then how excited I am when members of the Catholic League or some other fanatical sect of the Religious Right get themselves worked up over pop-culture.

Their latest target, the film version of "The Golden Compass."

At the heart of Catholic League's criticism is the notion that writer Phillip Purman, who penned the series of novels on which the film is based, is an avowed atheist. Since "The Golden Compass" was published more than a decade ago, critics have claimed that its story - in which a young girl battles against an age-old spiritually based organization which is seeking to rule the world - is anti-religious.

In an interview on the CBS Early Show, Bill Donohue, leader of the Catholic League, said that the film is an outright attack on religion.

"This teaches atheism to kids. Phillip Pullman is very open about this. The movie is basically innocuous, but parents may want to say to their kids, 'You know what? A great Christmas present would be to buy his 'Dark Trilogy,' the name of the three books.' Now you've introduced your kids to atheism.

The League is, of course, calling for a boycott of the film.

Now, I haven't seen the film yet. Nor have I read the original book on which it's based. But now, I'm fascinated.

Any time the Church, or those who claim to represent its interests, feels strongly enough about anything to openly campaign for its censorship or removal from public view, it only makes me want to see what the fuss is all about.

The studio, New Line Cinema, is attempting to combat The Catholic League's campaign by saying that the film is not at all anti-religious. Director Chris Weitz, on the film's web-site says it's a film about "things that matter, like the human spirit, loyalty, kindness and free will."

Something the Catholic League is apparently none too fond of.

"It's the definition of the Catholic Church," Donohue says, "They're teaching about the Pope convening with the bishops. The spin is too late now. They're trying to say all this could represent any authority. We're not talking about the police bureau or an abusive schoolteacher. They're talking about the Catholic Church. The book is clear."

And even if it is, so what?

Religious leadership constantly finds reason to rail against anything that falls outside of its world view to the point that it calls for its eminent destruction. Sounds an awful lot like an "age-old spiritually based organization which is seeking to rule the world."

Synchronicity I

My odometer and speedometer, eerily in sync last night...

Synchronicity II

A half mile later... for good measure.

Now these are some fightin' words...

Posted today on Reznor's web-site, www.nin.com, the alt-industrial rocker continues to rail against his former record company Universal Music.

Several years ago I persuaded my record company to let me begin posting my master recording files on nin.com, in order to see what kind of user-generated content would materialize from my music. I had no agenda… the main reason I did it was because I thought it was cool and something I would have liked to do if it was available to me. A lot of really fun stuff started to happen….communities developed, web sites were created, even traditional radio got in the game and began playing the fans' mixes. I felt the experiment, despite not having a specific purpose, was a success. So much so that we're now releasing a remix album that includes some of this fan-created material as well as the actual multitrack master files for every song from my latest record, Year Zero.


One piece was missing to me and that was an official nin.com presence for aggregating all of the fan-created remixes. Several intrepid fans had stepped up and done a great job providing a destination for people to post these, but I felt all along this was a function I should more directly support. So, upon release of this new remix album, our plan has been to launch an official site on nin.com that would provide a place for all fan remix material and other interactive fan experiences.

Or so I thought.

On Saturday morning I became aware of a legal hitch in our plans. My former record company and current owner of all these master files, Universal, is currently involved in a lawsuit with other media titans Google (YouTube) and News Corp (MySpace). Universal is contending that these sites do not have what is referred to as "safe harbor" under the Digital Millennium Copyright Act, and therefore are in copyright violation because users have uploaded music and video content that is owned by Universal. Universal feels that if they host our remix site, they will be opening themselves up to the accusation that they are sponsoring the same technical violation of copyright they are suing these companies for. Their premise is that if any fan decides to remix one of my masters with material Universal doesn't own - a "mash-up", a sample, whatever - and upload it to the site, there is no safe harbor under the DMCA (according to Universal) and they will be doing exactly what MySpace and YouTube are doing. This behavior may get hauled out in court and impact their lawsuit. Because of this they no longer will host our remix site, and are insisting that Nine Inch Nails host it. In exchange for this they will continue to let me upload my Universal masters and make them available to fans, BUT shift the liability of hosting them to me. Part of the arrangement is having user licenses that the fans sign (not unlike those on MySpace or You Tube) saying they will not use unauthorized materials. If they WERE to do such a thing, everybody sues everybody and the world abruptly ends.

While I am profoundly perturbed with this stance as content owners continue to stifle all innovation in the face of the digital revolution, it is consistent with what they have done in the past. So... we are challenged at the last second to find a way of bringing this idea to life without getting splashed by the urine as these media companies piss all over each other’s feet. We have a cool and innovative site ready to launch but we're currently scratching our heads as to how to proceed.
More to come….

By the way, the potential implications of a lawsuit like this one go well beyond creating hurdles for a Nine Inch Nails remix site. Here is an excerpt from technology site Ars Technica regarding a similar lawsuit Viacom has filed against YouTube:

The DMCA's Safe Harbor provisions aren't just important to video sharing sites; they're important to almost every sector of Internet-based business.
"Nearly every major Internet company depends on the very same legal foundation that YouTube is built on," said von Lohmann. "A legal defeat for YouTube could result in fundamental changes to its business, potentially even making it commercially impossible to embrace user-generated content without first 'clearing' every video. In other words, a decisive victory for Viacom could potentially turn the Internet into TV, a place where nothing gets on the air until a cadre of lawyers signs off," he said. "More importantly, a victory for Viacom could potentially have enormous implications for Yahoo, eBay, Amazon, MySpace, and many other Internet companies, because they all rely on the same DMCA Safe Harbors to protect many facets of their businesses, as well. The stakes are high all around."

Indeed.

What the critics are saying...

Ouch! Apparently, the Los Angeles Times was not impressed by CNN's handling of the Democratic debate in Las Vegas last Thursday. Despite record ratings for the political showdown, Times columnist Tim Rutten compared the event to the circus and host Wolf Blitzer to a carnival barker outside the tents of the bearded lady and the dog-faced boy. An excerpt...

"It all would be darkly comedic if CNN's descent into hyperbole and histrionics simply represented a miscalculation in reportorial style, but it signals something else -- the network's attempt to position itself ideologically, the way Fox and MSNBC already have done. In fact, we now have a situation in which the three all-news cable networks each have aligned themselves with a point on the political compass: Fox went first and consciously became the Republican network; MSNBC, which would have sold its soul to the devil for six ratings points, instead found a less-demanding buyer in the Democrats. Now, CNN has decided to reinvent itself as the independent, populist network cursing both sides of the conventional political aisle -- along with immigrants and free trade, of course."

"In other words, for the first time since the advent of television news as a major force in American life, the 2008 presidential campaign will be fought out with individual networks committed to particular political perspectives. Why does that matter? As far back as 2004, the nonpartisan Pew Research Center found that "cable now trails only local TV news as a regular source for (presidential) campaign information. In several key demographic categories -- young people, college graduates and wealthy Americans -- cable is the leading source for election news." Thus, for key segments of the electorate -- groups rich in what the pollsters call "likely voters" -- the main source of political news is now a partisan, or at least, a politicized one."

Read the full article here.

Get Your Game On!

In case you missed it last Friday on CNN.com...
Here's the latest installment of "Get Your Game On!"

Kia Ora!

Jean and I are back from New Zealand... with the pictures to prove it.

Check out the Flickr album here!

Feeling the burn

Unbelievable.
The sheer magnitude of the fires that continue to rage across Southern California.


When I heard first a report on KCRW-FM of a fire that had broken out in Malibu Sunday morning, I had no idea that the situation would erupt into what's quickly becoming one of the worst fire disasters in California history. As my buddies and I headed out for a morning surf at El Porto, a surf break south of LAX, I began to realize the severity of the situation. The Malibu point, usually visible on a clear day from Porto, was hidden behind a wall of smoke.



But today, as I watch the nearly continuous coverage of the dozen or so fires that are burning between Santa Clarita to the north, down to San Diego -- I'm humbled by nature's fury.

CNN.com has a spectacular slide-show of photos, with many submitted by viewers who have been forced to seek higher ground as the flames continued their relentless approach.

Back from the dead... Captain America

Today, Marvel Comics revealed that this January, the Star-Spangled Avenger, Captain America will return to his post in his monthly comic book.

According to this article at IGN, Cap will be return in "Captain America #34," wearing the red, white, blue and black?

Alex Ross is providing the designs that will update the Captain's classic costume - which still includes his signature shield... but now adds a gun to his arsenal.

But, in a Universe where death is often a temporary condition, Captain America writer Ed Brubaker confirms that it won't be Steve Rogers under the mask.

Find out who will wear the mask -and wield the mighty shield this January.

Here's the classic -- in the mighty Marvel manner of the 1960's.

Pop Digital on CNN.com

Check out this week's Pop Digital on CNN.com
Featuring Slacker - a new portable Internet radio device.

News Judgement - or complete lack thereof

Oh, the dichotomy!

A snippet from this morning's CNN editorial conference call notes:

[discussion about Myanmar/Burma]
"we need to continue to do story to build outrage."

Meanwhile, in the Los Angeles bureau, CNN's cameras, live trucks, reporters and producers are camped out in front of the L.A. County Courthouse waiting for the details of a closed door hearing involving the one-and-only Britney Spears and her ongoing child custody issues. A private family matter made embarassingly public by the media. I did mention it was a closed-door hearing? Like vultures waiting for scraps.

Meanwhile, half a world away in Myanmar... wait - K-Fed's here? He's wearing an eye-patch??

If creationists read the newspaper, they'd be freaking out about this....

From the AP:
Austrian judge: Chimps aren't people

"He's now got a human name — Matthew Hiasl Pan — but he's having trouble getting his day in court."

Animal rights activists in Austria are campaigning to have Pan, a 26-year-old chimpanzee, legally declared a person.

The legal battle dates back to February, when the animal shelter where Pan and another chimp, Rosi, have lived for 25 years filed for bankruptcy.

From the article:

Organizers could set up a foundation to collect cash for Pan, whose life expectancy in captivity is about 60 years. But they argue only personhood will ensure he isn't sold to someone outside Austria, where he's protected by strict animal cruelty laws.

The animal rights group has been pressing to get Pan declared a "person" so a guardian can be appointed to look out for his interests.

Group president Martin Balluch accuses the judicial system of monkeying around. "It is astounding how all the courts try to evade the question of personhood of a chimp as much as they can," he said.

NINE INCH NAILS Frontman Says His Record Company Is Run By 'Thieves'

From the article:

"It's a very odd time to be a musician on a major label, because there's so much resentment towards the record industry that it's hard to position yourself in a place with the fans where you don't look like a greedy asshole. But at the same time, when our record came out I was disappointed at the number of people that actually bought it."

Unless you used to work in the music industry, or have a great understanding of new media, it's often hard to understand why there is so much backlash against major record labels.

Trent Reznor manages to explain the problem - both from the perspective of being an artist - as well as music fan.

read more | digg story

Google Lunar X PRIZE

The X PRIZE Foundation and Google Inc. today announced the Google Lunar X PRIZE, a robotic race to the Moon to win a remarkable $30 million prize purse. ..to land a privately funded robotic rover on the Moon.


We have the technology; we've had it since 1969. Once the cold-war ended - and by extension, the Space Race - so too does it seem that real innovation in the area of space travel also slowed.

Yes, we have the ISS (International Space Station), but it's continued deterioration further underscores that NASA's mission has gone off-course and that the exploration of space greatly needs an infusion of new energy and new ideas.

The original Ansari X-Prize paved the way for the notion of "space tourism," by nurturing the concept of sub-orbital flight for the masses, which will hopefully be a reality within our lifetime. The Google Lunar X-Prize could do the same for civilian travel to the moon.


read more | digg story

Netizens offer new take on news

A leading research house compared the news coverage and popularity from three user-edited news sites including Digg to the the traditional news media and found the two mediums to be radically different. The traditional news media tend to focus on issues such as war, immigration, finance. Web news is more interested on console wars or what Paris or Britney is up to.

The original BBC.com article doesn't indicate that so called reader-aggregated news is replacing traditional journalism or for that matter, mainstream editorial decision making - but it does offer some interesting insight into the tastes and preferences of those who use the Internet as their main source of news.

read more | digg story

Album Artwork for iTunes

My geek-tendencies laid bare...

For some reason, music on my iPod just feels incomplete unless it's got artwork attached to it. Thanks to this web-site, now you can find FULL SIZE, hi-resolution artwork that you can attach to your songs in iTunes and in your iPod.

Check out this site: http://www.thejosher.net/iTunes

Sure, iTunes will sometimes do this for you automatically, but not necessarily at this resolution. Now, you can enjoy these images in all their 1425 x 1425 glory. It's not a complete library, mind you - you're subject to what Apple has on file.

It seems like no matter what the format, vinyl LP, CD or digital file - the artwork will always matter in music.

Meanwhile the guys that designed the GORGEOUS cover to "Axis: Bold as Love" are rolling over in their graves.

Cadbury Guerilla Marketing - Dairy Milk Gorilla Ad (VIDEO)

Cadbury has come up with a new gorilla marketing campaign. The 90 second Dairy Milk video doesn’t feature chocolate once, not verbally or visually, until the very last second. Instead, the video is focused on a gorilla playing the drums and rocking out to Phil Collins. (Quite possibly the best drum fill recorded in the 1980's)

Reportedly, it cost the UK-based chocolate maker 6.2 million pounds to produce.

The question I have is -- is it a man in a gorilla suit? Is it a puppet? Animatronic?

BMX Vert Finals @ X-Games XII

I managed to score VIP access to the X-Games in L.A. this weekend.

After taking in some Moto-X, I made my way to the giant vert ramp to catch the Finals in the BMX Vert Competition.

I was a witness to history at Simon Tabron from the UK pulled off the first-ever back-to-back 900's ever in competition. Despite this AMAZING feat, Tabron only placed SECOND the final.

You can only imagine what his fellow Brit Jamie Bestwick was doing on the ramp that allowed him to take home the Gold...

I took a bunch of photos with my cell phone. I'm an idiot for not thinking to bring something more substantial. You can check them out here.

Happy Birthday to ME!

What a weekend!
Good surf, good friends, good food and great times.

See some of the evidence here.

Best 14th birthday I ever had!

Much Ado About Nothing...

With news outlets and the paparazzi dutifully assembled outside of the L.A. County Correctional Facility in Lynwood, California, the unintentional queen of all media Paris Hilton made her grand exit in front of a live, international television audience early Tuesday morning.

If history so chooses to refer the socialite's exodus as a circus, then Hilton is the undisputed ringmaster -- leaving those of us in the media looking like clowns. Seriously.I'm pretty sure Hilton is the only inmate that has ever been released from prison with such a spectacle.

Sashaying down the walkway as if it were a red carpet, Hilton gave high-fives to the gathered crowd and ran into the arms of her mother, who gave her what would have been a heartwarming hug if she had bothered to actually get out of the SUV she was riding in.

No matter. The crowd ate it up. Photographers, both still and video, bum-rushed the vehicle to try and get a closer look. For our part, both CNN and CNN International broadcast the big moment live.

More than 5 hours later, I'm still wondering exactly "why?"

Behind the scenes, the levels of coordination and consternation leading up to Hilton's release were on par with some of the bigger news events I've covered.

In CNN's spartan Los Angeles bureau, our best-laid plans for wall-to-wall Hilton coverage were completely upended when a massive wildfire near Lake Tahoe forced us to move many of our resources to that area in order to report some actual news.

We've been reporting that Paris has been claiming that her experience in jail has changed her, that she wants to be a better person. Apparently, that doesn't include having the decency to just go away.

Meanwhile, Paris is enjoying a good night's sleep on some very high-thread count sheets. We're reporting that, too.

Fast feed nation

We not only live in a time where there is a ravenous appetite for media, with audiences salivating over the ever-increasing choices on a menu.

We're also living in a time when audiences want their media faster. In a morning panel on the final day of Digital Hollywood, the discussion turned towards the speed with which these seemingly endless options get to the audiences. Issues with broadband and high-speed Internet connectivity remain at the center of a lot of these discussions.

Having the option to order from the menus of 40 different restaurants is a great thing, but if you can't get that food delivered hot and fresh to your door, what's the point? (Yes, that's an an overly simplified argument, but the concept is the same.)

Consider this: Throughout the conference, I met with companies who were eager to show me demos of their product online. With the vast number of vendors on site, you can just imagine how much traffic there was on the hotel's wi-fi connection. Too many signals competing for access ... and suddenly nobody has access and your extremely cool demo has gone cold.

Everyone is trying to figure out where the next great Internet video or music story is going to come from, but how they're going to watch that show or download that song depends so heavily on how easily the audience connects to it.

All video, all the time, is a great thing for people to look forward to -- just as long as you can get access to the network to actually see it.

A better virtual mousetrap

During my first morning at the Digital Hollywood conference, I'm struck by how often the terms "social networking," "MySpace" and "YouTube" are slipped into the conversation. Even developers on the bleeding edge of technology are trying to figure out how to move beyond the shadow of these two "Web 2.0" giants.

There is no shortage of bright, enthusiastic software developers attending this conference who are trying to best these virtual beasts by building... well, a better beast. Or at least one a similar one. And therein lies one of the problems.

One of the reasons that sites such as MySpace and YouTube have become so successful lies simply in the fact that they were incredibly easy to use. Duplicating that kind of success much more complex. While everyone is scrambling to be the "next" MySpace or YouTube, there is a tendency to forget the idea that nobody is asking for the "next" version of either of these sites.

Now, if a developer were to create a product that vastly IMPROVED on that experience for users, they might have something.Instead, what you find is a lot of companies creating the tools for companies with web-sites who want to be like MySpace - who want to take advantage of the "community" aspects of social networking and put them to use as a means of promoting their own content. The problem is, if the content you are trying to create a community around isn't compelling, your social network will be anything but.

Social networking sites such as MySpace work because their users drive the conversation. Some would argue that site has suffered since News Corporation took over its operation and made that conversation more commercial. Still, at it's core - the user is the focus - and its the user's choice of content that makes the conversation interesting.

The key to the "next" MySpace is realizing that we don't need "another" MySpace. But we might be interested in something better.

How do you want your entertainment?

Lights. Camera. Confusion.

The weeklong Digital Hollywood conference in Santa Monica, Califonia, is an exploration of what could be next in terms of digital delivery of entertainment. Software and network developers have gathered together to display their wares in an attempt to offer solutions to the distribution questions nagging at the entertainment business. The industry wants to expand and improve the way it offers movies, music and shows to you, and these developers are trying to present ideas. But I say "could be next" because, while the developers are claiming to have the answer, nobody is really certain of what the question is.

While everyone -- both studios and software developers and sites -- agree on the importance of digital distribution, none of the players are really sure just how best to serve their consumers.

During a panel discussion focused on film and TV distribution, one of the key topics was user expectations. Panel members pointed to the success of Internet-driven businesses such as Netflix, which are able to offer nearly any film imaginable within 24 hours, versus some of the purely digital distributors such as CinemaNow, which have a much smaller inventory of titles.

And while these sites all have relationships with the various studios, that relationship is tentative at best -- and clearly favors the studio's desires, not necessarily the desires of the consumers.

Consumers want what they want. They don't really care about the software tools that help them get that movie or TV show. If users go to a site to find a particular title and can't find it, they will simply go and search for it elsewhere. If they find that particular title but it only works on their PCs but not on their iPods, again -- they'll inevitably find another way to get that content.

So what's the answer? It depends on what the question is ...

How to say Fuck You in Spanish

You've got to love diplomacy.
This was reported earlier today on CNN.com:

In response to Condoleeza Rice's call for a democratic transition in the communist nation of Cuba after the fall of Fidel Castro, president of the Cuban National Assembly Richard Alarcon said,

"I wish that some day there will be a democratic transition in the United States, that there will be a regime change in your country, a change from war to peace, a change from arrogance, and for this kind of interfering in everybody's affairs, and looking back a little bit at home and ... facing the real problems that Americans have."


Coma mierda, Condoleeza! Arriba!

Things that don't matter, but somehow do...

Incredible amounts of energy, effort, coverage and stress have been invested in the following nonsense today:

Lindsay Lohan and her D.U.I/return to rehab/21st birthday party.
Rosie O'Donnell's departure from "The View."

Meanwhile, Iraq war protester Cindy Sheehan decides to end her efforts... and gets labeled as an "attention whore" for it.

Excuse me?
Anyone?

Now, back to American Idol...

Happy Birthday to Jean

We celebrated Jean's birthday last Thursday in Vancouver with pints around 11AM... as you do.

Actually, it was just me drinkin' the pints. She never touches the Guinness. But in fairness, I did start the day with an hour of weights and cardio at the gym so I kind of earned it.

The Vortex

This was how I spent last Sunday in Atlanta preparing for a major presentation for the people who manage CNN's digital platforms. Cold shots of Wild Turkey and Shiner Bock beer from Texas. Yee-haw.

Robots and Monsters

Now this is a great idea for a great cause.

Joe Alterio, a San Francisco artist, is donating his talents as an illustrator to help raise money for the upcoming San Francisco AIDS Marathon.

For $25, you'll get an original illustration by Alterio of either a robot or a monster, drawn to your specification. For $40, you can get two robots or monsters -- or one of each!

Alterio says...

All fundraising will go towards the SF AIDS Foundation, which is dedicated to helping individuals and families afflicted with AIDS in the SF Bay Area, as well as the Pangea Foundation, which finances the global struggle against AIDS, in Africa and elsewhere

To learn more, or get your own robot and monster mashup, check out

RobotsandMonsters.org

Kill Your Television

Saw this on the Slashdot blog today:

"Reuters is running a story on a study that claims "Online video sites that sell shows and movies such as Apple Inc.'s iTunes will likely peak this year as more programming is made available on free outlets supported by advertising." Many channels have wised up to offering their content hosted from their own sites for free — with commercials — to cut out iTunes as the middle man. End result? Predictions that services like iTunes-Video have no future." (eldavojohn)
(Photo: Courtesy Reuters)


I can count on two fingers the number of times I've actually used the iTunes store to purchase either TV shows or movies. I tend to use a fairly good program called PSPVideo Creator to stream DVD's and compress them to the iPod and PSP friendly MP4 format. In fact, unless a DVD is so loaded with DRM that it's been rendered unplayable on my PC, it works for just about anything I have in my collection.

The reality is iTunes has one major edge over web-based network streams: portability. Downloading a TV episode to your PC is fine. Being able to take that episode with you on your handheld device is key. If I want to sit and watch last week's episode of "Heroes" because my Tivo missed it (which would really damage my relationship with it), I'm going to opt to put that content on my PSP and watch it in bed or take it on a plane with me instead of sitting in the same chair I use for nearly everything that's either creatively taxing or work related.

And while iTunes' days as a go-to outlet for episodic content may indeed be numbered, until these other outlets offer up the capability to download that and take it with you (and without commercials), iTunes and similar a la carte sites aren't going anywhere.

The New Frontier

Okay - from the posting title, you'd think what I had to say here was something epic. Sorry.

If you want something epic with the same title, perhaps a good dose of Darwin Cooke's ode to the Silver Age of comic books.

It's nothing short of amazing.




My work however is less exciting. And far short of amazing.

I've taken a new position within CNN's L.A. bureau. Here's bureau chief Pete Janos with the latest:

Today we are beginning a new western region initiative that shows tremendous promise.
We have created a digital team to provide material for CNN’s many digital platforms.
Heading up this endeavor are Sara Weisfeldt and Matt West. They both bring a versatile skill set and passion to the project. They have already begun working on pilots for pod casts, pipeline, and CNN dot com.

The goal here is to take the lead on digital extensions for the CNN networks. Please send any digital platform ideas/concepts/programs you have to Matt and Sara.

And there you go. It's a collaborative effort all the way with very few parameters. It's a little daunting, but pretty exciting at the same time. It's basically whatever I want it to be.

I've got to be honest - I pitched this concept out about 6 months ago. When the original idea seemed to die on the table, I wasn't sure I wanted to stay with CNN. So unsure in fact, I found myself applying for a position with the X-Prize Foundation as their Director of Production.

The interview process there was very exciting and was told the decision was between me and one other candidate.

Coincidentally, at the time that the folks at X-Prize were trying to decide between me and that other person, CNN finally came around and offered me this opportunity. At the time, I was set on leaving and going to join the X-Prize.

Fate had other plans. The X-Prize Foundation chose my competition (something about their having more of an entrepreneurial background and costing less). Either way, second prize wasn't so bad.

I've been at this for a little more than a week and today, I finally came to the decision that I actually like what I'm doing.

I'm working towards a big presentation in Atlanta in about a week and a half, developing several new pilot segments for use on their digital platforms. It's a combination of writing and producing along with project management with a healthy dose of super-heroic innovation. It's been fun.

It should get more interesting in the coming weeks. It's a new frontier.
Without a power ring.



Maybe I can requisition one in the next budget cycle.

Random Nonsense

Because breakfast is indeed the most important meal of the day, how about a little retro-toaster goodness?

The good folks at Instructables.com have instructions on how to make your own 80's arcade themed toaster.

Of course, you should probably ask your parents' permission. Then again, if you're still living in your parents house, maybe you should spend less time on funky arts-and-crafts and think about something a little more productive.

If you're a music junkie like me, Critical Metrics is probably gonna be your new pusher.

It's a new site that collects reviews from all across the music spectrum and gives you samples of the best new music according to critics, DJ's and tastemakers. You can listen to tracks, read the reviews and if you like what you hear, you can link to online retailers such as iTunes and Rhapsody to buy them.

Speaking of new music, the new Bjork album drops tomorrow in the U.S.* It's ridiculously good. But then again, I'm a fan.
You either get it or you don't.

And chances are, if your only reference for the pixie like, Icelandic vocal wunderkind is her "swan dress" appearance at the Academy Awards in 2001, you don't.

(*I say "in the U.S." as if I have a wide, international readership...)

It Won't Be The Hilton

The big news in Hollywood today was the sentencing of celebretard Paris Hilton to 45 days in jail for violating her probation. You can read this from the LA Times for the full story.

Or you can read this from my friend and colleague Matt Carey, a senior producer at CNN, who was inside the courtroom with a ringside seat.

Paris Hilton's day in court had moments of comedy before it turned serious and a judge sentenced her to 45 days in jail for violating probation.

Hilton took the stand in her own defense, claiming she wasn't aware of key details of her sentencing on a reckless driving charge last year. At that time her license was suspended and she was placed on three years' probation.

She said her lawyers told her to sign the court documents.

"I just sign what my lawyers tell me to sign," she told the court.

The judge interjected, asking her if she would have signed a million dollar check to her lawyer if he had put that in front of her.

Hilton was mailed documents stating the terms of her probation and license suspension but she testified she doesn't open her own mail.

"I have people who do that for me," she said. She later added, "I'm a very busy person."

She blamed her publicist Elliot Mintz for telling her she could drive while her license was suspended.

She said after she was pulled over in January and cited for driving with a suspended license she asked her publicist if her license was suspended and he told her no. She said she assumed the officer who cited her was mistaken about about her ability to drive.

Mintz took the stand to acknowledge he told Hilton she could drive to and from work during a period when she she was actually forbidden from doing so.

The judge tartly asked Mintz if he was a lawyer and Mintz said no.

Mintz could offer no explantion to why he thought she could drive while her license was supended

The judge, during sentencing, flatly rejected Hilton's testimony. He said "In my opinion there is no doubt she knew her license was suspended.". He added, "I think she just wanted to disregard that she couldn't drive."

After the judge announced he was revoking her probation, Hilton addressed the court, saying "I respect the law. I'm very sorry."

She added, "From now on I'm going to pay complete attention to everything," presumably referring to opening her mail.

Nuff said.

Manic Hispanic

Living in Los Angeles you become accustomed to, instead of the wonder and splendor of the beauty of nature such as trees and flowers, endless miles of billboards. They'll tack a billboard onto just about any structure - a building, a busboard, a port-a-potty.

Being a multicultural metropolis, we often enjoy bilingual billboards. And nobody enjoys those bilingual billboard more than the people whose photos are featured on them.



Take radio personality El Mandril... our happy Mexican friend is smiling (and pointing for some unknown reason).

What about El Cucuy? Again with the pointing. And boy, is he happy.

Put the two of these guys together and... WOW! They've gone and torn the head off a monkey!

Granted, these are "wacky" radio DJ's - but Jesus Cristo! A monkey???

This is from an ad for an insurance company that targets Latinos as its clientèle.

Smiling. Pointing. Maniacally happy.
I'm thinking it's a part of a larger cultural thing... ever seen Telemundo?
What's the Spanish word for Ritalin?

MMM - that is some tasty meat!

Last night, we had some friends over to the house for a little "Sideways" style dinner... you know, California wines, California inspired cuisine. ("Oh, of course," you say... )

We served a roast leg of lamb as a main course -- and it gave me a chance to play with one of my new favorite kitchen gadgets: a digital meat thermometer.

Simply put, if you do any kind of roasting whatsoever, this little toy is a must-have. Honestly, I don't care if you've been cooking meat over an open fire since the dawn of man. This is one upgrade you need to make.
The lead that is attached to the probe is oven/flame/heatproof up to 750 degrees. And let me just say, if your oven is capable of reaching up to 750 degrees - you have my respect - though I'm not sure what you're turning out of that kitchen other than ceramics.

It's fairly simple. You want to check the internal temperature of your roast, slip the stainless steel probe into the thickest part of the meat, wait a few seconds and the ultra-accurate thermometer will tell you how close you are to sinking your teeth into some tasty flesh.

This particular model has a feature that allows you to set the desired internal temperature so all you need to do is put the probe in, connect the lead to the thermometer and run it outside of the oven. When the roast hits the proper temp, the thermometer will alert you with an alarm. Sweet!

Personally, while I'm sure this little feature is the shit, I'm kind of old-school (as is my more than ancient O'Keefe and Merritt oven) and prefer to rotate my meat in the oven to make sure it's evenly cooked. Even still - the new school thermometer is the way cool.

Go get yourself one. Then, go get yourself a hulkin' hunka meat and have a party. And be sure to call me, my leftovers are only gonna last so long.

Reaching Out From The Grave

Apparently, Cho Seung-Hui wasn't as silent a killer as we thought - or hoped.

The Internet and television news networks a literally buzzing over the revelation that Seung-Hui , in between the first and second shootings at Virginia Tech, mailed NBC News a package containing what some have called a "multi-media manifesto" containing photos, videos and an 1800 word essay detailing his final act of brutality.

And while anybody who views these videos and photos or reads his ramblings will certainly and understandably be shocked and upset by what they see, can anybody say that they're truly shocked at the discovery of these materials?

Just when the news networks had packed up and headed home, leaving the students, faculty of Virginia Tech to heal in the aftermath of Seung-Hui's violent rampage, once again, that community, and to some degree the whole world, is once again victimized by one man's selfish, violent bid for immortality.

Not to diminish what's happened in any way, only as a means of putting things into a manageable context for no one but myself, the discovery Seung-Hui's words and images, 2 days after his one man act of terrorism -- smacks of nothing but pure cowardice... not unlike standing tall and talking shit over your shoulder as you walk away from a fight...

Always The Quiet Ones...

Cho Seung-Hui... the Virginia Tech student who murdered his way to international fame was apparently a loner -- with severe emotional problems. Apparently nobody, save for one of his English professors saw the carnage and brutality of his rampage yesterday coming.

He was apparently a playwright... channeling his anger and frustration into vitriolic prose for the stage. You can read his violent, one-act play here

There is a certain morbid curiosity that bubbles up inside those of us who weren't directly affected by Seung-Hui's violent curtain call. As the days and weeks progress, we'll learn more about this twisted soul and try to discern what it was that drove him from his quiet isolation to explode so violently in front of so many.

And while pundits and politicians scramble to politicize and alter policy in a knee-jerk reaction to such violence, maybe there is something to be learned.

Seung-Hui, according to the Chicago Tribune, "left an invective-filled note in his dorm room that included a rambling list of grievances and died with the words "Ismail Ax" in red ink on the inside of one of his arms."

Conspiracisy buffs and scholars have jumped all over this little detail, pointing to possible links to Islam. (Because in America, if it's a senseless act of violence, it's got to be tied to Islam... )

Says one blogger:

"He may have been trying to write the name "Ishmael." Wikipedia notes: "The name has come to symbolize orphans, exiles, and social outcasts."

From Mission Islam:

"He left his father after he lost hope to convert him to the right path, and directed his efforts towards the people of the town, but they rejected his call and threatened him. By Allah, he said, I shall plot a plan to destroy their idols. He knew that a big celebration was coming soon, where everybody would leave town for a big feast on the riverbank. After making sure that nobody was left in town, Ibrahim went towards the temple armed with an ax. Statues of all shapes and sizes were sitting there adorned with decorations. Plates of food were offered to them, but the food was untouched. "Well, why don't you eat? The food is getting cold." He said to the statues, joking; then with his axe he destroyed all the statues except one, the biggest of them. He hung the ax around its neck and left. "

What was Seung-Hui trying to say? We'll never know. His inner turmoil forever silenced along with the lives and spirits of 33 innocents.

It's always the quiet ones.

Unimaginable

The Virginia Tech tragedy. It's almost unimaginable. Or is it...

Just last week, the CBS drama "The Unit" featured this as their story:

"In Loco Parentis"
The Unit is called in to help out the local SWAT team when a prominent school in Virginia is taken over by shooters. They must determine how to free the hostages without the students getting injured.

Not that you need to relive the experience, as it continues to unfold live on CNN, but the entire episode is actually streaming on CBS' broadband channel, Innertube.

Catching up with an overeaching underachiever...

Let's see... where do we begin?
Surely SOMETHING has happened to keep me away from the Chronicles.

Was it the beginning of a new swim training program designed to increase my paddling power for surfing?

I mean, I am up to 40 laps on my way to an eventually 100 lap swim, but that's probably not it. Although, I will say - I've noticed that I am paddling a bit harder when I'm out in the surf.

Maybe it was the recent South swell we recently enjoyed here in SoCal?

I mean, I managed to get out and get some waves for three days last week, but I also managed to find myself at the office idling my time away turning stories on everything from "The Sopranos" to the legacy of Rolling Stone magazine and DC Comics' "Wonder Woman."

It could've been "Marvel: Ultimate Alliance," a fiendishly addictive game for the Playstation that has cost me more than 19 hours of my life -- and continues to plague me as I struggle to find the means to defeat the diabolical Dr. Doom in the game's final...

It might be the song-writing and musical experimentation I've been working on. With 2 songs completed and a third bubbling away on my hard-drive, the largely electronic (for now) project has certainly taken up quite a bit of my time -- but again, I've also managed to find time to eat and bathe, so it's not quite a Mozartesque effort.

Then again, it might be the books and comics that I've been busying myself with -- including Chuck Palahniuk's "Diary" and Warren Ellis' wildly cool "New Universal," but I also have a girlfriend, so I haven't quite fallen into uber-nerd territory (unless I'm already too lost in my own world to see the forest for the trees).

Of course, it might just be case of general laziness, but where would I find the time for that?

For Glory!

Not that I'm usually in the practice of breathless gushing, but I've got to say a few words about the upcoming film, "300."

Amazing. Awesome. Fucking great. Seriously.

The film is based on a graphic novel by Frank Miller ("Sin City," "The Dark Knight Returns") and tells the story of the battle of Thermopylae in which King Leonidas along with 300 Spartan warriors, battled to the death against Xerxes and the entire Persian army.

The original tale, as presented in the graphic novel was an amazing combination of Miller's unique illustrations and poetic prose style. A great read.

But what Zach Snyder has done with the film adaptation is nothing short of... at the risk of repeating myself, Amazing. Awesome. Fucking great. Seriously.

You WILL want to see this in theaters. It's out on March 9th.

I'll spare you any attempts at writing an actual review and instead, point you towards the film's official site where you can satisfy your curiousity and whet your appetite for blood. (Quite a bit of it is spilled over the course of its 2 hour run time)

For extra credit, you can always read up on the original source material. Check it out here.

"Our arrows will blot out the sun."
"Then, we will fight in the shade!"

Fucking great. Seriously.

Art vs. The Government

By now, you've surely read the headlines about the Adult Swim promotional campaign that brought the city of Boston to a standstill. (LINK)

What strikes me as frightening in the fallout from all of this has nothing to do with the fact that "bomb squads scrambled throughout the city and its suburbs, snarling traffic and mass transit in the city," but the idea that city leaders are hellbent to make sure somebody is punished for the incident.

First, let's be clear. This wasn't a "bomb scare that turned out to be a hoax."
It's a public art project that an overly paranoid government turned into a bomb scare.

The irony of all of this is that the objects in question, which are only slightly more sophisticated than a Lite-Brite, were placed in several cities including Los Angeles, San Francisco and Ground Zero, New York. You would think if anybody is going to overreact to a "suspicious object," it would be New York.

Of course, nobody in New York, L.A. or San Francisco reacted to the public art project because - well, it's New York, L.A. and San Fran... three cities practically choking to death on public art projects.

So why did the city managers in Boston freak out? A complete lack of a sense of humor. I mean, we're talking about a Space-Invader alien flipping the bird here.

Sadly, as the city leaders in Boston do their best to recover from the embarrassment (nobody likes it when they don't get the joke), the government will step up efforts to insure that similar "guerrilla marketing" and art projects don't cause the same kind of panic. In fact, upon learning that several of the light-boards had been in New York for more than a week, the NY PD was reportedly dispatched to take them down.

And while we're beginning to get used to the notion of the "chilling effect," somehow I don't think a government crack-down on art is going to play to well with the people who make it.

I'm reminded of a quote from Benjamin Franklin lately:
"They who would give up an essential liberty for temporary security, deserve neither liberty or security."

In an age where our leaders come up with creative ways of explaining how by removing our freedoms, they're ensuring our freedoms, we need more people who are willing to give our government the finger. And if they do it with a Lite-Brite, so much the better.

Wasting My Time on The Company's Dime

Among the random, useless e-mails I receive on a daily basis, today I received a message informing me of an impromptu corporate training session taking place in our offices today. Joy!
And because it's a company crusade, it's mandatory. Bliss! And, to make sure any hopes for actually accomplishing anything at the office today are dashed, it's three hours long. Rapture!!!

Settle down, Beavis... today we're "Building Respect In The Workplace."

What the fu--? (Sorry, apparently that's inappropriate language)

Didn't I just sit through this three hour dirge a year ago? (Yes.)

Have the rules about what's respectful and disrespectful among my colleagues somehow changed in the past year? (No. Apparently, the same standards from 2004 still apply today.)

Madness. Pure, unadulterated madness.

What really bakes my skull about this is that at some point this quarter, I'm supposed to take time out of my day to explain exactly how I've earned my paycheck, maximizing my time and productivity at work and therefore insuring value for our shareholders. (I shit you not... )

I wonder how well it's going to go over when I explain that I couldn't get as much work done as I would've liked because I spent most of a perfectly good workday in a seminar where I was taught "if you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all."
For three hours.

FINALLY!

After countless reunions by bands that we could've done without , (Van Halen, anybody?) The Police have finally decided to put aside their differences and cash in. More than 20 years in the making, this is perhaps the most exciting news (if not the worst kept secret) in the entire music industry.

The newly reunited trio will begin their march back toward global domination with an appearance at the Grammy Awards next month and then launch a full-scale tour. They're expected to announce details for the tour as soon as they work out the details.


Talk about your big pay-days... in a world where lip-syncing no talents (sorry, Maddona) can command top-dollar for "performing," there's no telling how much money these guys are going to be able to charge for concert tickets. And much as I hate to admit it, I'll happily pay any price.


Link

Bad Science

I came across this while scouring the web earlier today. Apparently, it's part of the kids menu at the pseudo-Italian restaurant chain Pomodoro.

This might also explain why your check appears to also be slightly off the mark at the end of the evening.

Just A Fancy Way Of Saying "Hanger On's"

Another day at Sundance, another day of tripping over people from Hollywood.
At home, it's easy enough to avoid the madding crowd. For me, I head for the comfort and relative safety of southern Santa Monica and Venice. And while the west side does attract a fair amount of the celebrity types, they generally live and hang out in an area that's outside of my tax bracket.

Here in Park City, Utah - they're everywhere... all manner of actor, producer and of course - their entourage.

As a member of the media, I get it. Given the number of reporters and outlets covering Sundance, it's fairly common for a publicist to accompany actors to various interviews. What strikes me as wholly unnecessary is the addition of make-up artists, hair-stylists and at least two to three random idiots whose sole function appears to be to hold an actor's jacket, or in the case of our production suite, raid our fridge.

If you're an actor, you're basically moving in between various indoor locations spending less than 5 minutes outside - where the air is clear, the wind is minimal and the temperature below freezing. Taking that into consideration, how much primping to your hair do you really need? And make-up? Honestly. If you're having someone freshen your face every 10 minutes you need to invest in a better quality of product.

As for the hanger-on's - other than holding your jacket and taking your Starbucks cup out of your hand and putting it down on a table (never to be retrieved), is it really necessary for this person to be on hand?

And while the Hollywood elite has certainly made the argument for the persistence entourage - it's their presence with the Hollywood Wannabe or Will-Never-Be that truly confounds. Other than to take up space and breathlessly kiss ass, I'm not sure why they're here.

Back home in Hollywood, one could simply chalk it up to being a loser with a moderately interesting friend. Here in Park City, where again, the temperature is below freezing, it smacks of... being a loser with a moderately interesting friend smoking cigarettes in the cold. Maybe it's a type of co-dependence among friends that's so deeply rooted, it causes separation anxiety when one party is without the other.

The entourage... a fancy way of saying "hanger on's," like boiteux is just another way of saying "lame. "

Freezing In The Sun

For the past five days, I've been working at the Sundance Film Festival in Park City, Utah.

Usually, when people find out that's what you've been doing, the first questions are, "so what movies have you seen," and "have you been going to any killer parties?" Much to their surprise, the answer is a resounding "none, " and "no."

You see, unlike many of the people who attend the festival, I'm not here to actually take part in any of the festivities. I'm just here to work. So, instead of hitting all of the hospitality suites and lounges to pick up thousands of dollars in free shwag, I'm shooting video of people picking up those bags of goodies. Instead of taking advantage of my press credentials and getting V-I-P access to concerts and industry parties, I'm standing out in single-digit degree cold and shooting video of people clamoring to get inside. I'm not bitter, I'm simply too busy...

One of the strangest aspects of Sundance would have to be the star-gazing. I know why I have to stand outside in the freezing cold waiting for celebrities, film-makers and actors to show up to parties and premieres; because it's my job and I'm getting paid for it. What I don't understand is what would possess someone to willingly endure those same sub-freezing temperatures, for the sole purpose of capturing a grainy cellphone camera shot of Tara Reid or some other celebretard. I think the cold might actually be affecting their brains. As I was exiting a building that was being used by Entertainment Weekly magazine as a location to shoot various actors for an upcoming issue, the crowd outside was so thick and frenzied, they actually started screaming and applauding as I made my way out the door. Definitely brain damage.

Stay tuned...